Returning in Triumph

June 8, 2012 at 3:01 am (Uncategorized) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , )

Bottom Center: Alex Diab

In 1996, while awaiting trial on murder charges, inside Chicago’s infamous cook county jail, I received a visit, the only visit I could count on… my lawyer. He informed me that I could take a 20 year plea bargain or face a possible death penalty if I went to trial.  As his words slowly faded into my thoughts I contemplated my “options” and looked back at my life of violence and self-destruction. Having no one to confide in and nowhere to turn to for relief, I came to the stark realization that I was alone… no wife, no kids, and no hope for a future on the outside. On that same evening I covered the bars of my cell door with towels, not to be seen by the rest of the inmates, and proceeded to call on a God I did not know. I made a deal with the Lord Jesus Christ that day, and vowed that if He got me out, I would serve Him and bring others to Christ. It was that same night that I received a vision of the resurrected Christ, ripping the prison’s barb wires and motioning me to walk through. A few years later I was acquitted, released, and set out to keep my promise.

I was later blessed with a wife and three kids. I had a beautiful family and a great hunger for Christ, but although I was saved and had that heart-felt consecration, it took years of trial and error, disappointment and discouragements before I was ever to receive a breakthrough. Through a great wilderness journey of temptations and grave setbacks which sadly confused and horrified church brethren and family members alike (especially my wife who endured my drug addiction to heroin), I was plagued with nightmares of my violent past. The bondage, shame, and guilt of that past crippled my personality and identity. I battled with insomnia, tormenting grief, and bipolar disorder. Innumerable attempts were made at reconciliation with God, man, and myself.  As I sought to restore broken relationships with those whom I’d hurt, I was met with rejection and suspicion, which only served to swerve me farther away from the God who had already forgiven me and had stood by my side. The God who never gives up on one, the God who stands with you despite your failures, fears, and foes! Even if you are the principal foe, God continues to see the best in you.

In the midst of my pity parties and self-loathing complaints I began to seek the Lord as I did while in prison, through constant dependence on His word. It is here where the pressures and fears that were arrayed against me began to crumble. My heart was soon pervaded with an acute sense of God’s watchfulness. As it unveiled in the depths of me, my great need to respond to His Great concern, ability, and love for me and everything about me, it encouraged me to overcome my past and pursue the undeniable unmistakable call of God on my life!!! That in spite of my many mistakes and sins, extreme hurts and betrayals, if I only made an earnest, honest attempt to seek Him and not be afraid to fight the devil, He would take care of ALL else! And so today I have returned in Triumph. I have returned to the day I called upon God from that prison-house where I struck a deal with Him, to serve Him and bring others to Christ; as the Lord exhorted Peter, “Simon, Simon, behold Satan desires to have you, that he may sift you as wheat: But I have prayed for thee, that your faith fail not: and WHEN THOU ARE CONVERTED TURN BACK AND STRENGTHEN YOUR BRETHREN…

And so today I turn back to reach for You, Will you reach back?

Above Only and Not Beneath,

Alex N. Diab

11 Comments

  1. Sorangel Rosado said,

    Wow…………. God is good……….. I found myself not being able to sleep…. Then i stumble across this…….. Thank u Jesus for usein Nasir to open eyes to read Gods words…… Ears to hear his story n strenght to get up n dust ourselves off n try again………. Thanx……… Love yall…………. Dios es todo poderoso………. Amen

  2. jamil A. diab Ortiz said,

    Ur on ur way. I’m so proud of u keep doing ur thing. U forgot to mention that I was gonna take the 20 ye plea bargain that they offered us. Love u bro. I WANT A SIGNED COPY OF DANGEROUS POTENTIAL …love u Guy’s, God bless ..

  3. Marta said,

    God Bless You brother and He always give you strength Keep going in what God put you to do.

  4. RonRon Gorny said,

    Alex-
    God is amazing. I praise God for your turn-about in Christ and your desire to go back for the ones left behind. I know that you know some of the guys I worked with in Chicago. I’m anxious to talk with you about them and what God is doing and your willingness to step into the flow of what he is already doing. I may have some good connections for you to talk with. Please get back in touch. So many things I want to ask you about!

    No man left behind

    In His Grip
    Ron Gorny
    Crossfire Gang Outreach

    • dangerouspotentialministries said,

      Looking forward to talking with you Ron!

  5. Alex’s Story: Out of the Shadow and into the Light | Gang Life Chicago said,

  6. dangerouspotentialministries said,

    Reblogged this on Dangerous Potential Ministries and commented:

    For the sake of new viewers who are not familiar with my testimony we have re-blogged our first article. I pray you are blessed by it.

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  8. residences noida said,

    I could not refrain from commenting. Well written!

  9. 34ffdave said,

    I want to start a ministry but everybody keeps telling me that it’s too dangerous and I shouldn’t do it. I know I have God on my side and I want to do it! I do need some advice…Do you have a email that I can contact you? This is an awesome story! God Bless!!!

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